Fake Smiles
by jemmy9
Summary: When did your smile become fake?
1. Chapter 1

You wonder when you stopped smiling. When a fake and plastic smile began gracing your features. It doesn't reach your eyes. A flute of champagne is pushed softly into your hand and you drink from it without question. You know that it will be followed by many more. You do your best to pay attention to the conversation taking place before you, but you find your mind drifting, leaving you to only nod your head and hope that is the right response. Suddenly you notice everyone's attention is on you, expectant looks in their eyes.

"Pardon?" Your voice sounds emptier than you ever remember it being. Lifeless.

"When's the wedding dear?" The woman to your left questions. Ah, the wedding. A subject you had long ago grown tired of hearing about.

"June 20th. It's getting so close." You come across as excited to the group surrounding you, why wouldn't you be excited about your wedding?

"How are the plans coming along?" Another woman asks.

"Almost done. Just a few last minute touches." You watch as the women all begin to talk amongst themselves about various aspects of _your_ upcoming nuptials, you've heard it all before.

"Excuse me ladies but do you mind if I borrow my fiancé?" Before you know it his hands are around your waist he is leading you towards the much needed bar.

"My saviour." You exclaim whilst ordering a vodka martini.

"You looked cornered." You pause at his comment, and the familiarity of it. You're instantly reminded of another blonde and times long suppressed. Plastering yet another fake smile on your face you look up at William and kiss him softly on the lips.

"What would I do without you?"

"Luckily you'll never have to know." You both take your drinks and continue to make the rounds. These events have always bored. The only way to survive them is to get drunk (without making a scene), or to sneak off to the coat room (without getting caught). Tonight you drink, preying to drown out freshly surfaced thoughts of the blonde whose arm you were once on.

You're quickly jerked from your thoughts when Will stops dead in his tracks beside you, bringing you to a halt with him.

"Gosh give a girl some warning." You look up and see Will focused on the opposite side of the room, his eyes fixed in a glare. "What's wrong?" You question as you follow is his gaze. Unfortunately you find your answer, and you really wish you hadn't.

"What is he doing here Rory?" If looks could kill you honestly don't know who would be first on Will's list as he stares down at you with the same glare.

"I don't know Will. Maybe he's here with someone. It's not like this is our party, he could easily have been on the guest list." You rationalize.

"He's been gone for 6 months and he just happens to show up tonight?! 3 weeks before our wedding at an event we happen to be attending?! The world isn't that small Rory." He pulls his arm from yours and makes his way across the room, leaving you no choice but to follow, grabbing another champagne flute as you go. You know your going to need it.

Of all nights for him to show up, it just had to be tonight. The night your thoughts were brought back to him after trying to block him out for so long. You understand Will's anger, if you were in his position you'd be angry too.

"What are you doing here Logan?!" Will quietly yells, not taking his eyes of Logan, who is staring intently at you.

"Nice to see you too Will. And here I thought you'd be happy to see me." You watch as Logan finally gives his attention to Will, smirking all the while.

"You shouldn't be here Logan. Why are you even back?" Will is seething. You want to say something, tell Logan to leave and rid Will of his worry, but your voice is nowhere to be found.

"When father calls I come running. It's similar to that 'you say jump' I say 'how high?' thing." Logan's eyes once again travel to you and all you can do is look back.

"I don't believe you. Why would you just happen to show up 3 weeks before the wedding?" You knew he was going to say it sooner or later, but you thought you had more time. The shock is written all over his face. His eyes travel to your ring, which delicately resides on your left hand as it grips the champagne flute for dear life, then back to your face. His eyes betray him as he composes himself; his eyes show just how upset he is. You want to crawl up and die. You didn't want him to find out. You knew he would, and you made your choice, but that didn't stop you wanting to take it all back.

"Unfortunately Will I wasn't actually aware of the impending wedding. This is the first I've heard of it. I guess congratulations are in order." Will visibly softens at Logan's confession. You watch him carefully plot his next move, and hope that it doesn't require you to do or say anything.

"Thanks. We're very happy." Comes Will's smug reply as he pulls you closer. You're his prize. His trophy. Proof that he won and Logan lost.

"I bet." His disbelieving tone pushes you. Why can't he just let you be happy? Why can't he just believe it, and stay gone.

"Why are you here Logan?" You speak up for the first time since his arrival, venom lacing your voice.

"Business. Running in to you was just a lucky accident. You believe in happy accidents don't you Ace?" You cringe, and before you know it your hand connects with his face. Gasps can be heard throughout the room as the slap echoes louder than you thought possible. Logan's hand is on his face, his eyes firmly fixed to yours.

"Rory what the hell?" Will questions, but you don't answer. It's game. You know it was probably wrong to hit him, but he's wrong for saying anything. For dredging up a past you're trying desperately to forget. After a few moments his breakaway from yours, giving you your victory.

"Will we should go, we still haven't spoken with my grandparents." Before he has time to answer you pull him away by the arm.

You make your way to the bar for another drink, you've already lost count of how many you've had. Normally Will would call you on it, but the surprise known as Logan has distracted him for the better part of the evening. This is the first time he has let you out of his sight since Logan's entrance, and the slap that followed. You understand his fear. But instead of feeling sympathy you just feel annoyed. You shouldn't even still be together. Why he forgave you you'll never know.

"Number 9 with a bullet?" His voice is smooth and not angry like you expected it to be. You want to be mad. You won't to hate him but you know it's a pointless task.

"Liquid courage." He takes the spare seat next to you and orders his own drink. The silence between you is deafening.

"I meant what I said before. Congratulations." He speaks quietly, as if he's afraid to say the words. You look up at him, and for the first time you notice the sadness in his eyes. It radiates off him.

"Thank you."

"See, we can have normal conversation. Without yelling, crying or slapping. Although I must admit, that was one hell of a slap Ace." You chuckle at his comment, but more at his attempt to lighten the mood. You can see he's trying. You're not really sure why though. Why try now?

"What's so great about normal?" He smiles into his drink at the quote that once meant so much to the both of you. You can see him wrestling with himself, trying to decide what to say. "Just say it Logan."

"Say what?" He questions innocently.

"Whatever it is that you are sitting there trying not to say. It's written all over your face." He contemplates what you've said before turning fully to face you.

"Why aren't you happy?" You're taken aback by his question, you hadn't expected it.

"What do you mean? I am happy." It rings false.

"No, your not. That smile you keep plastering on your face is just an act. You're just trying to keep everyone else happy."

"How the hell would you know Logan? What do you know about happy? What do you know about me?" At your last comment anger register quickly on his face and he stand up, getting as close to you as possible.

"Don't you dare tell me I don't know you. I know you better than anyone else." You turn to leave but he grabs you by the shoulders and forces you to face him. "Do not brush off what we had as nothing. You know it was real. It wasn't a mistake! Will can forgive you all he wants and you can go through all the motions of planning a wedding, hell you can even get married. I don't care. It will always be you and me."

"WHY NOW?! Why are you here and telling me this now? If I remember correctly you are the one who left. I was the one that had to stay here and pick up the pieces of everything you destroyed! You disappeared for 6 months. You should have just stayed gone." You get up and make your way over to where Will is talking with your mother. Before you reach them Logan drags you out onto the balcony, closing the doors quietly behind him.

"You told me to leave. You told me to make it easy for you and to leave. What did you think I was going to do?" He yells, not caring anymore about the volume of his voice.

"I thought you were going to stay!" You scream back.

"Why? So I could keep watching you with Will. You weren't going to leave him. I knew you weren't. So when you told me to leave, I did what I thought was best for you. I could see you falling apart. You'd been a mess ever since…"

"Don't!" You cut him off, not liking the direction the conversation is going.

"Do you really think I wanted to leave you like that?"

"You were only with me because you couldn't have me. After everything that happened if became too real and you bolted, just like I knew you would."

"NO! That is not how it was and you know it. You told me to go. You couldn't stand to be around me anymore. I couldn't just sit around and watch you be the shell of your former self." You stare at him and search for any signs of dishonesty. You want to go on believing that it's all his fault.

"I left him."

"What?" He questions confused.

"The night I told you to leave I went to see Will. I told him there was someone else and that I was sorry, but my heart belonged to them. He was so mad. But I didn't care. I knew I had to be with you." You're crying now, but he makes no move to comfort you. "I went to see you the next day and you were gone. Honour told me about you going to see your dad and taking him up on the job in London. And that was it. I went back to Will and apologized profusely, told him it was a mistake and that I wanted him in my life. He took it slow for awhile, just being friends…"

"And now you're getting married." You wipe the tears away from your face quickly, hating that you'd shown such weakness in front of him. Neither of you say anything for what feels like an eternity. The distance between you seems like miles.

"I didn't come here for business." Logan finally says, breaking the tension.

"Then why did you come?"

"I wanted to see if you were okay. Dad actually has no idea I'm here. I didn't expect you to be here, let alone be here on Will's arm as his fiancé." Logan takes a few steps closer to you. "I wanted to see if I'd made the right choice. To see if me leaving had really helped you." He steps closer to you again. "But it hasn't, has it?" You shake your head, afraid to speak. He takes two more steps and is now mere inches from you. "I didn't intend for you to think I'd let you go. I was just trying to help you. After you lost the baby nothing I did seemed to help. You just looked so broken, all the time. But you seemed better when you were around Will. So I did what I though was best, and I left when you asked me to. I thought he would be able to take care of you, because I couldn't." You can feel his breath on your cheeks and all you want is to freeze time. Live in this moment forever. With him.

"Rory?" The sound of Will's voice pulls you back to reality. Logan moves to stand beside you so you can see him standing at the balcony doors.

"Hey sweetie."

"What are you doing out here with him Rory?" He closes the doors and approaches you, spitting daggers from his eyes.

"We were just talking Will." At least you aren't lying.

"Why don't I believe you?" He scoffs.

"We weren't doing anything. I was just apologizing for upsetting Rory earlier." Partial truth.

"Because I'm going to believe what you have to say."

"Believe me. I'm your fiancé and I'm not lying to you."

"Whatever. Let's go, it's getting late." Will holds out his hand toward you. You want to go with him, to do the right thing. But how can you do the right thing when your heart is screaming at you not too? You look back at Logan, his eyes pleading at you to finally make your choice. To finally decide.

"Rory?" Will questions again, his arm still extended towards you.

"I will wait forever for you Rory. But if you tell me to go, I will." Logan whispers. And you know.

"I'm so sorry." His face falls and you turn back to Will. "I can't marry you."

"What? Rory everything was fine until he showed up. He's just going to leave again. And I won't be there to pick up the pieces next time. We can be happy together."

"No, we can't. I can't be happy with anyone but him. I'm so sorry Will." You place the engagement ring in his hand before lightly kissing his cheek and taking your place next to Logan. Where you belong.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's note.

Wow. I didn't expect so many people to read my story and like it. I guess I shouldn't been 100% surprised given how many Gilmore Girls fanfictions I read. This is the first time I've posted one of the many random ideas I have about the show. It was just something I wrote the other day at work and decided why not post it.

I feel I owe you all a little bit of explanation of the events of the story, I easily forget that just because I know the details, it doesn't mean everyone else does.

It's set after the end of the shower, probably about 1-2 years. Rory is in another relationship, with Will, when she runs into Logan. It doesn't take long for them to start an affair, because we all know they belong together. About 6 months in Rory gets pregnant, and is sure it's Logan's (for arguments sake I decided this was a clear fact rather than a theory). But she loses the baby and that takes a big toll on their relationship. It's hard for her to be around him. She feels like losing the baby was payback for her having an affair.

I'm obsessed with writing in 2nd person, I have no idea why, but it just seems to suit the way I write. I'm also strangely obsessed with AU storylines relating to Gilmore Girls. Even though I love the show, I like twisting things and seeing where things might have gone etc.

I hope this covers any questions you had.

And then ending… well I'm not going to lie, I just ran out of steam, and it was also the end of the day at work and I was running out of time. I liked leaving it with her choice though. Because that's what it's about it. Deciding what's going to make you happy. You don't need to know what happens after. I like the somewhat implied idea (it may have only been implied to be given that I wrote it haha), that in her choosing Logan, that meant she would be happy.

Thanks for reading.


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